INCEST

INCEST

(Unforced Sexual Relations with Close Family Members)

God's Law vs Man's Law

The Wicked will continue to be Wicked

I cannot help Myself

If your Brother Repents, Forgive Him

Forgiveness is as much for the Abuser as it is for the Abused

The Abused can become Abusers if they Don't Forgive

Forgive or you won't be Forgiven

You are possessed by the one you Love

God will Give you the desires of your heart

 

Leviticus 18 & 20

The LORD said to Moses,

"Speak to the Israelites and say to them: 'I am the LORD your God.  

You must not do as they do in Egypt, where you used to live, and you must not do as they do in the land of Canaan, where I am bringing you. Do not follow their practices. 

You must obey my laws and be careful to follow my decrees. I am the LORD your God.

Keep my decrees and laws, for the man who obeys them will live by them. I am the LORD.

"'No one is to approach any close relative to have sexual relations. I am the LORD.

 

Leviticus 18

The Command

 Leviticus 20

The Punishment
"'Do not dishonor your father by having sexual relations with your mother. She is your mother; do not have relations with her.  
"'Do not have sexual relations with your father's wife; that would dishonor your father. "'If a man sleeps with his father's wife, he has dishonored his father. Both the man and the woman must be put to death; their blood will be on their own heads.
"'Do not have sexual relations with your sister, either your father's daughter or your mother's daughter, whether she was born in the same home or elsewhere. "'If a man marries his sister, the daughter of either his father or his mother, and they have sexual relations, it is a disgrace. They must be cut off before the eyes of their people. He has dishonored his sister and will be held responsible.
"'Do not have sexual relations with your son's daughter or your daughter's daughter; that would dishonor you.  
"'Do not have sexual relations with the daughter of your father's wife, born to your father; she is your sister. "'If a man marries his sister, the daughter of either his father or his mother, and they have sexual relations, it is a disgrace. They must be cut off before the eyes of their people. He has dishonored his sister and will be held responsible.
"'Do not have sexual relations with your father's sister; she is your father's close relative. "'Do not have sexual relations with the sister of either your mother or your father, for that would dishonor a close relative; both of you would be held responsible.
"'Do not have sexual relations with your mother's sister, because she is your mother's close relative. "'Do not have sexual relations with the sister of either your mother or your father, for that would dishonor a close relative; both of you would be held responsible.
"'Do not dishonor your father's brother by approaching his wife to have sexual relations; she is your aunt. "'If a man sleeps with his aunt, he has dishonored his uncle. They will be held responsible; they will die childless.
"'Do not have sexual relations with your daughter-in-law. She is your son's wife; do not have relations with her. "'If a man sleeps with his daughter-in-law, both of them must be put to death. What they have done is a perversion; their blood will be on their own heads.
"'Do not have sexual relations with your brother's wife; that would dishonor your brother. "'If a man marries his brother's wife, it is an act of impurity; he has dishonored his brother. They will be childless.
"'Do not have sexual relations with both a woman and her daughter. Do not have sexual relations with either her son's daughter or her daughter's daughter; they are her close relatives. That is wickedness. "'If a man marries both a woman and her mother, it is wicked. Both he and they must be burned in the fire, so that no wickedness will be among you.
"'Do not take your wife's sister as a rival wife and have sexual relations with her while your wife is living.  

 

"'Do not defile yourselves in any of these ways, because this is how the nations that I am going to drive out before you became defiled.

Even the land was defiled; so I punished it for its sin, and the land vomited out its inhabitants.

But you must keep my decrees and my laws. The native-born and the aliens living among you must not do any of these detestable things,

for all these things were done by the people who lived in the land before you, and the land became defiled.

And if you defile the land, it will vomit you out as it vomited out the nations that were before you.

"'Everyone who does any of these detestable things--such persons must be cut off from their people.

Keep my requirements and do not follow any of the detestable customs that were practiced before you came and do not defile yourselves with them. I am the LORD your God.'"

You are to be holy to me because I, the LORD, am holy, and I have set you apart from the nations to be my own.

 

Lot and his daughters

Genesis 18:16-19:38  

When the men got up to leave, they looked down toward Sodom, and Abraham walked along with them to see them on their way.

Then the LORD said, "Shall I hide from Abraham what I am about to do?

Abraham will surely become a great and powerful nation, and all nations on earth will be blessed through him.

For I have chosen him, so that he will direct his children and his household after him to keep the way of the LORD by doing what is right and just, so that the LORD will bring about for Abraham what he has promised him."

Then the LORD said, "The outcry against Sodom and Gomorrah is so great and their sin so grievous that I will go down and see if what they have done is as bad as the outcry that has reached me. If not, I will know."

The men turned away and went toward Sodom, but Abraham remained standing before the LORD.

Then Abraham approached him and said: "Will you sweep away the righteous with the wicked?

What if there are fifty righteous people in the city? Will you really sweep it away and not spare the place for the sake of the fifty righteous people in it?

Far be it from you to do such a thing--to kill the righteous with the wicked, treating the righteous and the wicked alike. Far be it from you! Will not the Judge of all the earth do right?"

The LORD said, "If I find fifty righteous people in the city of Sodom, I will spare the whole place for their sake."

Then Abraham spoke up again: "Now that I have been so bold as to speak to the Lord, though I am nothing but dust and ashes, what if the number of the righteous is five less than fifty? Will you destroy the whole city because of five people?"

"If I find forty-five there," he said, "I will not destroy it."

Once again he spoke to him, "What if only forty are found there?"

He said, "For the sake of forty, I will not do it."

Then he said, "May the Lord not be angry, but let me speak. What if only thirty can be found there?"

He answered, "I will not do it if I find thirty there."

Abraham said, "Now that I have been so bold as to speak to the Lord, what if only twenty can be found there?"

He said, "For the sake of twenty, I will not destroy it."

Then he said, "May the Lord not be angry, but let me speak just once more. What if only ten can be found there?"

He answered, "For the sake of ten, I will not destroy it."

When the LORD had finished speaking with Abraham, he left, and Abraham returned home.

The two angels arrived at Sodom in the evening, and Lot was sitting in the gateway of the city. When he saw them, he got up to meet them and bowed down with his face to the ground.

"My lords," he said, "please turn aside to your servant's house. You can wash your feet and spend the night and then go on your way early in the morning." "No," they answered, "we will spend the night in the square."

But he insisted so strongly that they did go with him and entered his house. He prepared a meal for them, baking bread without yeast, and they ate.

Before they had gone to bed, all the men from every part of the city of Sodom--both young and old--surrounded the house.

They called to Lot, "Where are the men who came to you tonight? Bring them out to us so that we can have sex with them."

Lot went outside to meet them and shut the door behind him and said, "No, my friends. Don't do this wicked thing.

Look, I have two daughters who have never slept with a man. Let me bring them out to you, and you can do what you like with them. But don't do anything to these men, for they have come under the protection of my roof."

"Get out of our way," they replied. And they said, "This fellow came here as an alien, and now he wants to play the judge! We'll treat you worse than them." They kept bringing pressure on Lot and moved forward to break down the door.

But the men inside reached out and pulled Lot back into the house and shut the door.

Then they struck the men who were at the door of the house, young and old, with blindness so that they could not find the door.

The two men said to Lot, "Do you have anyone else here--sons-in-law, sons or daughters, or anyone else in the city who belongs to you? Get them out of here, because we are going to destroy this place. The outcry to the LORD against its people is so great that he has sent us to destroy it."

So Lot went out and spoke to his sons-in-law, who were pledged to marry his daughters. He said, "Hurry and get out of this place, because the LORD is about to destroy the city!" But his sons-in-law thought he was joking.

With the coming of dawn, the angels urged Lot, saying, "Hurry! Take your wife and your two daughters who are here, or you will be swept away when the city is punished."

When he hesitated, the men grasped his hand and the hands of his wife and of his two daughters and led them safely out of the city, for the LORD was merciful to them.

As soon as they had brought them out, one of them said, "Flee for your lives! Don't look back, and don't stop anywhere in the plain! Flee to the mountains or you will be swept away!"

But Lot said to them, "No, my lords, please!

Your servant has found favor in your eyes, and you have shown great kindness to me in sparing my life. But I can't flee to the mountains; this disaster will overtake me, and I'll die.

Look, here is a town near enough to run to, and it is small. Let me flee to it--it is very small, isn't it? Then my life will be spared."

He said to him, "Very well, I will grant this request too; I will not overthrow the town you speak of.

But flee there quickly, because I cannot do anything until you reach it." (That is why the town was called Zoar.)

By the time Lot reached Zoar, the sun had risen over the land.

Then the LORD rained down burning sulfur on Sodom and Gomorrah--from the LORD out of the heavens.

Thus he overthrew those cities and the entire plain, including all those living in the cities--and also the vegetation in the land.

But Lot's wife looked back, and she became a pillar of salt.

Early the next morning Abraham got up and returned to the place where he had stood before the LORD.

He looked down toward Sodom and Gomorrah, toward all the land of the plain, and he saw dense smoke rising from the land, like smoke from a furnace.

So when God destroyed the cities of the plain, he remembered Abraham, and he brought Lot out of the catastrophe that overthrew the cities where Lot had lived.

Lot and his two daughters left Zoar and settled in the mountains, for he was afraid to stay in Zoar. He and his two daughters lived in a cave.

One day the older daughter said to the younger, "Our father is old, and there is no man around here to lie with us, as is the custom all over the earth.

Let's get our father to drink wine and then lie with him and preserve our family line through our father."

That night they got their father to drink wine, and the older daughter went in and lay with him. He was not aware of it when she lay down or when she got up.

The next day the older daughter said to the younger, "Last night I lay with my father. Let's get him to drink wine again tonight, and you go in and lie with him so we can preserve our family line through our father."

So they got their father to drink wine that night also, and the younger daughter went and lay with him. Again he was not aware of it when she lay down or when she got up.

So both of Lot's daughters became pregnant by their father.

The older daughter had a son, and she named him Moab ; he is the father of the Moabites of today.

The younger daughter also had a son, and she named him Ben-Ammi ; he is the father of the Ammonites of today.

 

2Peter 2:3-10

Their condemnation has long been hanging over them, and their destruction has not been sleeping.  For if God did not spare angels when they sinned, but sent them to hell, putting them into gloomy dungeons to be held for judgment;  if he did not spare the ancient world when he brought the flood on its ungodly people, but protected Noah, a preacher of righteousness, and seven others;  if he condemned the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah by burning them to ashes, and made them an example of what is going to happen to the ungodly;  and if he rescued Lot, a righteous man, who was distressed by the filthy lives of lawless men  (for that righteous man, living among them day after day, was tormented in his righteous soul by the lawless deeds he saw and heard)-- if this is so, then the Lord knows how to rescue godly men from trials and to hold the unrighteous for the day of judgment, while continuing their punishment.  This is especially true of those who follow the corrupt desire of the sinful nature and despise authority.

 

Lot was a righteous man who was distressed by the filthy lives of lawless men.  His righteous soul was tormented by the lawless deeds he saw and heard.

Because of this, God chose rescue him and spare his family.

How is it then, that Lot could sleep with his own daughters and get them pregnant???

Let's look more closely at this passage:

  1. Lot was waiting at the gate of the city.  He recognized the Angels of the Lord but took it upon himself to protect them rather than simply trust and obey them.
  2. The people of Sodom and Gomorrah knew the Angels had come to judge them and wanted to corrupt them by having sex with them
  3. Lot was not afraid to go outside and face them.  Lot was prepared to sacrifice himself as well as his own daughters for the sake of righteousness and to protect the Angels of God.  (Similar to the way that Abraham was prepared to sacrifice his son Isaac)
  4. Lot tried to save his son in laws but they did not believe him.
  5. Lot refused to flee to the Mountains (possibly due to a lack of faith)
  6. Lot and his family were taken to the city of his choice (Zoar - which means small) but his wife looked back and died
  7. Lot was alone and isolated
  8. Lot lost everything that he had worked for; his house, his wife, his city, his people, his land and his hope
  9. He allowed himself to get drunk and lost his self control
  10. He did not respond appropriately to the advances of his daughters.

This is not unlike many people today who have improper sexual relations with their children or other family members.

People who are often good at heart, people who are not getting their sexual needs met by their partner, people who have suffered loss, people who are in a rut, people who are alone or isolated, people with poor self esteem, people who are low in faith, people who have experienced abuse, people who are small minded, people who have given themselves over to drunkenness, intoxication or the influence of drugs, people who do not have the strength to resist temptation.

There is a parallel with Noah. After Noah and his family were saved from the flood and the rest of mankind had been destroyed, Noah got drunk.  He allowed himself to be found naked by his son Ham.  Ham dishonored his father and in so doing was cursed.  (Abraham and Lot were descendants of Shem)

We must not turn our back on child abuse or close our eyes when we see it happening around us.  To do so is as bad as committing it yourself.  (Leviticus 20:1-5)

 

 

Ruben and his Father's concubine

Ge 35:22 While Israel was living in that area, Reuben went in and made love to Bilhah. She was the concubine of Reuben’s father. And Israel heard about it.

Ge 49:2-4 Listen to your father Israel. “Reuben, you are my oldest son. You were my first child. You were the first sign of my strength. You were first in honor. You were first in power. But you are as unsteady as water. So you won’t be first anymore. You had sex with your father’s concubine in his bed. You lay on his couch and made it ‘unclean.’

 

Absolom and his Father's concubines

2Sa 16:22 So they pitched a tent for Absalom on the roof, and he lay with his father’s concubines in the sight of all Israel.

 

Salvation
Isaiah 53:12  Therefore I will give him a portion among the great, and he will divide the spoils with the strong, because he poured out his life unto death, and was numbered with the transgressors. For he bore the sin of many, and made intercession for the transgressors.

Isaiah 53:5 But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed.

John 3:14-21  Just as Moses lifted up the snake in the desert, so the Son of Man must be lifted up,  that everyone who believes in him may have eternal life.   "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.   For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.   Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because he has not believed in the name of God's one and only Son.  This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but men loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil.   Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that his deeds will be exposed.   But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what he has done has been done through God."

Romans 6:10  The death he died, he died to sin once for all; but the life he lives, he lives to God.

Romans 8:3  For what the law was powerless to do in that it was weakened by the sinful nature, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful man to be a sin offering. And so he condemned sin in sinful man,

Romans 3:21-8  But now a righteousness from God, apart from law, has been made known, to which the Law and the Prophets testify. This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.  God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood. He did this to demonstrate his justice, because in his forbearance he had left the sins committed beforehand unpunished-- he did it to demonstrate his justice at the present time, so as to be just and the one who justifies those who have faith in Jesus.  Where, then, is boasting? It is excluded. On what principle? On that of observing the law? No, but on that of faith.  For we maintain that a man is justified by faith apart from observing the law.

Romans 8:3  For what the law was powerless to do in that it was weakened by the sinful nature, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful man to be a sin offering. And so he condemned sin in sinful man,

Galatians 5:4  You who are trying to be justified by law have been alienated from Christ; you have fallen away from grace.

Titus 3:4-7 But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life.

Hebrews 4:16  Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.

Hebrews 9:22-10:14
In fact, the law requires that nearly everything be cleansed with blood, and without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness.  It was necessary, then, for the copies of the heavenly things to be purified with these sacrifices, but the heavenly things themselves with better sacrifices than these.  For Christ did not enter a man-made sanctuary that was only a copy of the true one; he entered heaven itself, now to appear for us in God's presence.  Nor did he enter heaven to offer himself again and again, the way the high priest enters the Most Holy Place every year with blood that is not his own.  Then Christ would have had to suffer many times since the creation of the world. But now he has appeared once for all at the end of the ages to do away with sin by the sacrifice of himself.  Just as man is destined to die once, and after that to face judgment, so Christ was sacrificed once to take away the sins of many people; and he will appear a second time, not to bear sin, but to bring salvation to those who are waiting for him.   The law is only a shadow of the good things that are coming--not the realities themselves. For this reason it can never, by the same sacrifices repeated endlessly year after year, make perfect those who draw near to worship.  If it could, would they not have stopped being offered? For the worshipers would have been cleansed once for all, and would no longer have felt guilty for their sins.  But those sacrifices are an annual reminder of sins,  because it is impossible for the blood of bulls and goats to take away sins.  Therefore, when Christ came into the world, he said: "Sacrifice and offering you did not desire, but a body you prepared for me;  with burnt offerings and sin offerings you were not pleased.  Then I said, 'Here I am--it is written about me in the scroll-- I have come to do your will, O God.'" First he said, "Sacrifices and offerings, burnt offerings and sin offerings you did not desire, nor were you pleased with them" (although the law required them to be made).
Then he said, "Here I am, I have come to do your will." He sets aside the first to establish the second.
And by that will, we have been made holy through the sacrifice of the body of Jesus Christ once for all.
Day after day every priest stands and performs his religious duties; again and again he offers the same sacrifices, which can never take away sins. But when this priest had offered for all time one sacrifice for sins, he sat down at the right hand of God. Since that time he waits for his enemies to be made his footstool, because by one sacrifice he has made perfect forever those who are being made holy.

Hebrews 10:16-23  "This is the covenant I will make with them after that time, says the Lord. I will put my laws in their hearts, and I will write them on their minds." Then he adds: "Their sins and lawless acts I will remember no more." And where these have been forgiven, there is no longer any sacrifice for sin.  Therefore, brothers, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water.  Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.

Hebrews 10:26  If we deliberately keep on sinning after we have received the knowledge of the truth, no sacrifice for sins is left,

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